PICTURE: PEXELS/ (EDMOND DANTES)
Networking can feel intimidating, especially if you’re naturally shy or introverted. The thought of introducing yourself to strangers or making small talk may seem overwhelming, but building professional relationships doesn’t require being the loudest person in the room.
Also see: Benefits of networking you should know
In fact, meaningful networking is about creating genuine connections, listening well and showing interest in others. With the right approach, anyone can grow their professional network and open the door to new opportunities.
1. Start with a clear goal
Walking into a networking event without a plan can increase anxiety.
Before attending, decide what you’d like to achieve. Your goal could be meeting three new people, learning more about a particular industry or finding someone working in a role you’re interested in.
Having a simple objective can make the experience feel more manageable.
According to CareerJunction, setting realistic networking goals helps professionals focus on building quality relationships rather than trying to meet everyone at once, leading to more meaningful connections.
2. Prepare a short introduction
You don’t need a lengthy speech about yourself.
Prepare a brief introduction that includes your name, what you do and what you’re interested in. Practising it beforehand can help you feel more confident when introducing yourself.
For example:
“Hi, I’m Thandi. I work in digital marketing and I’m interested in learning more about content strategy and brand communications.”
Indeed South Africa recommends preparing an elevator pitch so you can confidently introduce yourself when opportunities arise.
3. Ask questions instead of doing all the talking
One of the biggest myths about networking is that you need to dominate the conversation.
People generally enjoy talking about their work and experiences. Asking thoughtful questions can take the pressure off you while helping you build genuine connections.
You could ask:
- What inspired you to work in this industry?
- What do you enjoy most about your role?
- What advice would you give someone starting out?
According to Indeed South Africa, active listening and asking thoughtful questions can help you leave a stronger impression than focusing only on talking about yourself.
Also see: Networking like a pro to boost your career
4. Use LinkedIn to break the ice
Networking doesn’t always have to happen in person.
Platforms like LinkedIn allow you to connect with professionals, engage with their posts and introduce yourself before or after an event.
Commenting thoughtfully on industry discussions or sending a personalised connection request can help you start conversations naturally.
LinkedIn advises personalising connection requests rather than sending generic invitations, as this helps establish more authentic professional relationships.
5. Attend smaller events
Large conferences can feel overwhelming.
If you’re shy, consider attending workshops, industry seminars, community meetups or professional association events where conversations tend to be more relaxed and personal.
Harvard Business Review notes that smaller gatherings often create better opportunities for deeper, more meaningful conversations than large networking events.
6. Bring a friend or colleague
Attending an event with someone you know can help reduce nerves.
A colleague or friend can introduce you to others and make it easier to join conversations without feeling like you’re starting from scratch.
Just remember not to spend the entire event talking only to the person you came with.
7. Follow up after meeting someone
Networking doesn’t end when the event is over.
Send a short LinkedIn connection request or email thanking the person for their time and mentioning something you discussed.
According to the social media platform, following up within 24 to 48 hours helps strengthen new professional relationships and demonstrates genuine interest in staying connected.
8. Focus on building relationships, not collecting contacts
Successful networking isn’t about how many business cards you collect.
Instead, aim to build authentic, long-term relationships with people who share your interests or work in your field.
Harvard Business Review recommends focusing on creating mutually beneficial relationships rather than simply expanding the number of contacts in your network.
9. Be yourself
Many people believe they need to act more outgoing to network successfully, but authenticity often leaves a stronger impression.
Share your interests, experiences and career goals honestly rather than trying to impress others.
According to CareerJunction, authenticity and professionalism help build trust, making it easier to develop long-lasting professional relationships.
10. Remember that many people feel the same way
Even experienced professionals can feel nervous at networking events.
Keeping this in mind can help reduce the pressure you place on yourself. Most people appreciate friendly, respectful conversations and are often happy to share their experiences.
Indeed South Africa points out that networking is a skill that develops with practice, and confidence tends to grow as you continue to engage with new people.
Final thoughts
Being shy doesn’t mean you can’t become an effective networker. By preparing in advance, asking thoughtful questions, following up after conversations and focusing on genuine relationships, you can build a strong professional network over time.
Networking isn’t about being the most outgoing person in the room—it’s about making meaningful connections that can support your career growth for years to come.
Also see: How to advance your career with confidence
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